However, my main advice to the young men at the conference was more personal—live your life in a way that women know you are one of the good guys. Be respectful. Be professional. We discussed concrete ideas for ways to be supporters, such as being aware of what is going on around you, especially at events where alcohol is served, and we discussed scenarios they might encounter in a work situation, such as a female co-worker being pestered at a conference. (This particular one happened to me often back in the day.) We talked about ways to intervene without being overbearing—mingle your way into the conversation so she can easily brush the guy off if she wants to—and after reading many of the #MeToo accounts, I would also add—help her watch her drink. We need to have more conversations like these. Men want to help us, and we need to start talking about ways they can do that.
Ending the tacit categorization of all men as potential predators probably wouldn’t do a lot of harm either.